Hardly a day goes by when I don’t hear or read some kind of coffee pun and this article is loaded with a compendium of the very best and brew-tal coffee puns to express yourself with and enjoy a whole latte laugh over your morning or afternoon mug of coffee.
So pull up a chair and enjoy a nice cup of Joe as you brew through a selection of the very best coffee puns ever.
The aroma of light-hearted fun is already filling the air and by the time you are finished reading you might just be ready to roast me with your own cute coffee pun or two!…If you can’t, don’t worry, be Frappé!
Cute Coffee Puns About Love And Flirting
When I met my girlfriend, I just knew I had a whole latte love for her, I just knew her kiss was going to be like a perfect Espresso — hot and steamy! And that is how we like our humor at Latte Love Brew, hot and steamy!
1. “Words cannot espresso my love for you.”
2. “There is definitely something brewing between us two.”
3. “Is that a steam wand I see in your pocket? Are things about to get steamy between us…?”
Certainly one for a confident barista and coffee lover is one I overheard between to hot steamy baristas at my local Starbucks…
4. “Pass the coffee and sugar babe, you just made me cream my pants!”
5. “Like coffee I could keep you up all night long!”
6. “You are exactly how I love my coffee: Tall, dark, strong and very hot!”
Read: Coffee related puns
7. “My friends nicknamed me espresso because I grind so fine.”
8. “Forget the coffee, give me your number — That sounds like a fair trade.”
9. “Forget the shot of coffee — I’ll have a double shot of you!”
10. “You Mocha Me Crazy!”
11. “You are so Brew-ti-ful.”
12. “You and me, we are the perfect blend.”
13. “I’d love to French Press you up against the wall, you will Espresso your joy by s-creaming a latte.”
14. “I love Brew.”
15. “You are so brew-ti-ful, where have you bean all my life? I don’t want to mocha this up but it is better latte than never – can I Java your number?”
Try that with your hot local barista – and don’t “affogato” to ask their name!.
Coffee Puns About Popular Music Culture
Few coffee puns come better than the sound of music and being creative with song names and band names — such as:
16. Fleetwood Macchiato.
17. Chris-beana Aguilera.
18. Olivia Brew-ton John.
19. Lady Java.
20. Smashing Pumpkin Spice Latte.
22. Vanilla Ice latte.
23. Rage Against The Espresso Machine.
If you are not having a café laugh-fe here with some of those, what a funny coffee pun or two with some song lyrics like:
24. Don’t worry, be frappée – Bob Marley.
25. Brew-tiful day – U2.
26. Wake me up before you coco – Wham!
27. One more cup of coffee – Bob Dylan.
28. Smells like tea spirit – Nirvana.
29. What’s Sumatra you hey shudda up ya face – Joe Dolce.
30. frappé your arms around me – Agnetha Fältskog.
31. Latte Be – The Beatles.
32. I like big mugs and I cannot Lie – Sir Mix-A-Lot.
33. Excuse me while I kiss this chai – Jimi Hendrix.
34. A cup of coffee puns – Johnny Cash.
35. Espresso-ly for you – Kylie Minogue.
36. Java nice day – Bon Jovi.
37. Everything I brew, I brew it for you – Bryan Adams.
38. Mugnificent – U2.
39. That’s why you’re brew-tiful – Bean-yonce.
40. Sip me baby one more time – Britney Spears.
Coffee Puns About Movies
The coffee pun lover and movie lover in you will just giggle at the these coffee puns inspired by the silver screen!
41. Charlie’s Angels: Full Forth-le.
42. Reservoir Mugs.
43. Legally Blended 2.
44. Acupalypse Now.
45. The Nutty Espresso.
46. The Grinding.
47. Some Like It Shot.
48. Team Americano.
49. Lock, Stock And Two Roasting Barrels.
50. For Your Cups Only.
51. Misto Congeniality.
52. Grindhog Day.
53. Terminator 3: The Rise Of The Macchiatos.
54. The Brew-man Show.
55. Tall About Eve.
56. The Usual Extracts.
57. 28 Days Latte.
58. Brew-stirs Millions.
59. Soy Story.
60. Americano Brew-ty.
61. Flat Whites Can’t Jump.
62. Froth Here To Eternity.
63. Beverly Hills Cup.
64. Froth Metal Jacket.
65. Little Misto Sunshine.
66. Cool Beans Running.
67. Legally Blended.
68. The Bourne Venti-ty.
69. The Polar Espresso.
70. The Wedding Latte.
71. S-cream 3.
72. Latte And Leopold.
73. One Brew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest.
74. Mocha Lisa Smile.
75. Grande Torino.
76. Kicking And S-Creaming.
77. Forth Here To Eternity.
78. Hot Shots Deux.
For the movie buffs and those that love drinking coffee, here is a cool list of imaginatively thought out coffee pun names.
79. Al Cappuccino.
80. Brew Cary.
90. Bean Affleck.
91. Michael Muglas.
92. Paul Brewman.
93. Java The Hut.
94. Brew Brees.
95. Sean Bean.
96. Ariana Grande.
The barista in you might be getting a little deja brew with these fun coffee puns that are coming up in this next section.
Coffee Puns And Barista Puns
97. My barista and hipster friend has never bean on time for meetings; you could say he is fashionably latte.
Funny Stories About Coffee
As a coffee shop owner I was rather depressed during the lockdown I was despresso’d! I actually remained open but one day the police caught me “cold”, told me to close, or they would “press” charges! It was just one of those days I just knew something was “brewing” the moment I got out of bed.
I was a happy frappé when no charges were pressed!
If you have your own funny coffee pun or funny stories about coffee to share please do I’d love to hear it. Perhaps it is a story you have “bean” waiting to write and maybe, just maybe, you have a coffee pun or two that I have never heard or thought of.
Coffee Puns: One Liners And A Coffee Joke Or Two
98. What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
99. How did Moses make his coffee?
100. How did King Henry VIII have his morning coffee?
101. Why is coffee nicknamed “Mud”?
(Because it was ground a few minutes ago).
102. Why is the coffee shop owner sad?
(‘Cos he has a bit of a latte problem)
103. What do coffee beans and kids have in common?
(They are always getting grounded).
104. Why did two coffee lovers seek couples therapy?
(Their love life as kind of frappé)
105. What Is It called When Your coffee gets stolen?
106. How do you know your local gossip queen is a coffee lover?
(She is always asking people to spill the beans!)
107. How did the hipster burn their tongue?
(He drank his coffee before it was cool).
108. Why are Italians so emotional?
(Because they are so good at espresso-ing themselves)
109. How can a bad cup of coffee ruin a marriage?
(Because making a bad cup of Java is grounds for divorce).
110. What do coffee shop employees call their face masks?
(A cough-y filter).
111. How does a computer nerd have their favorite cup of coffee?
(They install Java).
112. What do you call a country that has no freedom of the press?
113. Why was the coffee bean checking its watch every 5 minutes?
(It was pressed for time)
114. What is the Terminators favorite saying?
(Hasta barista, baby!)
115. What is a gym-loving coffee addict’s favorite exercise?
(The French Press).
116. How do you bury a coffee addict?
(In a coffee-in).
117. Why was the barista fired?
(He kept turning up for work in a tea-shirt).
118. What has a divorce and espresso got in common?
(They are both expensive and bitter).
119. What do baristas do when not working?
(They try to blend in with the rest of us!)
120. What did the coffee lover say after a heated debate?
(Alright, take your best shot!)
121. Why did the latte fall out with the mocha?
(Because it had bean mean).
122. What did the Coffee Mug say to the coffee pot to make it blush?
(You are steaming hot!).
123. Why do kangaroos refuse to drink a cup of coffee?
(It makes them jumpy).
124. What do you call coffee bullies?
125. Why does coffee have no effect on filters?
(It runs right through them!).
Sexy Risqué Coffee Puns, Coffee Jokes And More Coffee One-Liners
First up is a coffee pun that perhaps women can relate to and have a giggle at.
126. What has a hot coffee and sexy men got in common?
(They can both injure your throat in a good way!).
127. What did the flirty slut say to her favourite barista?
(This coffee is not the only thing that is hot and wet).
128. Why is coffee better than a frigid woman that is playing hard to get?
(A coffee is easy and goes down quicker).
129. What has Starbucks and whore got in common?
(They both suck and leave your wallet empty).
130. How are sexy men just like coffee?
(The best one a rich, tall and keep you up all night!).
Coffee Puns About Literature
Some very well-thought-out coffee puns!
131. The lord of the beans.
132. To whom the bean tolls.
133. To bean or not to bean, that is the question.
134. The count of macchiato.
135. The brothers caramel Mocha
136. David Coffeefield
Coffee Bean Puns And Phrases
137. What have you bean up to?
138. Stick ’em up! You’re under a roast!
139. Bean, there, done that.
140. Being a lover of the morning roast is a mugs life!
141. Sip happens!
142. Take life one cup of Joe at a time.
143. Are you sick? Well I’ve bean coffeeing and sneezing.
144. What have you bean waiting for?
145. Cold brew you help me with the rowdy customers I see some trouble brewing!.
146. If you don’t wear a face mask you might end up on a Venti-later.
147. Nest-cafe where birds enjoy coffee.
148. Mugs And Kisses – how a coffee cup and coffee mug greet each other.
149. By all beans necessary I’ll get my daily cup of Java.
Final Thoughts – Coffee Puns
Well that’s it for this list of Coffee puns and Coffee Jokes for now, If I can think of more I’ll definitely add them, I’m not Keurig-ing you, if your coffee pun or puns hit the mark I’ll add them – just pop on over and visit us on our Facebook page and send it in, especially if you have some puns regarding decaffeinated coffee, iced coffee or even one or two about tea!